This album is one of my favourite and most mysterious LPs. The packaging itself is DIY at its most basic: Plain white jacket with spraypainted colour and the groups’ name and album title rubber stamped on the cover. No date of release but I’m guessing early Eighties. The labels on the record itself are recycled and appear to be originally slated for a Saxon release on Carrere. There is a one-sided insert which carries the records information. There isn’t much, so I can reproduce the entire liner notes here:

“Take A Teat by Udder Milk Decay. Produced by Tim Hunkin and Jim Hunkin.”

Not very enlightening. There is a sculptor by the name of Tim Hunkin but when I emailed him regarding this album, he assured me that it wasn’t him (“Good name though”).

On to the music which is primitive lo-tech electronics at its best. The album starts with a short track, which sounds like plucked strings (could be a guitar or a harp or bedsprings for that matter); the second has Wasp-like whirrs, beeps, bloops and whistles that evolve at a leisurely pace which has some similarity to Nik Raicevic’s “Head” album but less circular. Track three sounds like a radio tuning in and away from white noise. Track four? Like track two after a bulk eraser had a pass over the tape.

Side two begins with a triple-speed recording of a conversation. I can’t make out what the voices are talking about, but it does sound quite earnest. The lengthy second track suggests a BBC Radiophonic Workshop soundtrack for a stop-motion version of Dr. Who. The final cut features heavily processed sounds (a treated orchestral recording perhaps?) broadcast from a cavern.

In the event of finding a copy in a used shop or thrift store: buy it as it is a curious and improbable album that isn’t likely going to get the deluxe cd reissue treatment.